BSG: And There Shall Be No More Happiness

The Ties That Bind, the third episode of the season, pretty much killed all happiness and good will fostered by the previous showing. Since it's the beginning of the season, I can only guess that it's downhill from here. So, way to go, Battlestar Galatica.

Adama and Roslin made up the same way that they always do: by pretending that nothing ever happened. I swear, there are no apologies needed in the fleet; Lee expounded a little on this theory in Baltar's trial, but pretty much forgiveness is floating around in the air. There's probably a forgiveness ship in tow, processing sins and churning out saints. So, Adama and Roslin are back to buddy buddy old flames, though I'm guessing Adama's son will cause a little rough water. Real sons always have issues with step mothers.

Lee has finally made his last transition from pilot to politician, with was hailed with one of those, I don't know what I'm doing moments, a Mr. Smith Goes to Washington move of standing up in court and saying something that gets shoved right back. Lee here, however, is a little manipulated by Tom Zerek, the current vice president, ex subversive, and former Captain Apollo in the 1970s. Apparently, Roslin's turning the fleet into a facist state, with a Madonna at the lead. Doesn't fly with Lee, who lets freedom ring even with scumbags like Baltar. So he calls her out: with Zerek's help (which is undoubtedly fueled by selfish motivation), Lee reveals Roslin's preliminary plans for a tribunal answerable only to her, with powers to hold and try anyone. Just like the Cylons on New Caprica.

Needless to say, there is little love being lost between Lee and Roslin, at the moment.

Little love lost between the Cylons, too. (Where are these people losing love? Can they find it? Do they need help?) An all out civil war has erupted following the self aware status of the Centurions and the move to unbox D'Anna and find the Final Five. Brother Cavil, who is carrying on a May-December fling with Boomer, ugh...ugh. Oh man. Let me recover.

Brother Cavil pretty much broke bread all over the Six and her crew, in such a way that bread need not be broken no longer: he destroyed the Six controlled ships in an area where downloading, and thus resurrecting, is impossible. How will the wronged party return? Well, they'll find a way. Cavil's too creepy to win. Also, Cavil might in fact be the creator of the Cylon skin jobs. He seems so intent on keeping rank and law that he must have some sort of stake in this beyond what the other models see. But that's wild supposition.

Kara's sewage ship, which somehow hand picked the biggest brains on Galatica, is lost. Actually, it's dirty, and it's lost. The disorder might be the first problem. No one actually thought to clean up the sewage ship before heading out, or even in the down time while traveling. Sewage helmets, and I'm only assuming they are thus, cover the tables where these people eat. That rules out any form of a three second rule. Another explanation might be that there was a raging costume party the night before.

It has been three weeks since they launched, and everyone hates Kara except Sam, who has nothing but puppy love, and Helo, who is incapable of ill will. Kara sits in her private quarters on the space version of the ship from Heart of Darkness, painting pictures and changing her mind. She also likes to mess with Sam's heartstrings, but, let's be honest, he doesn't stand a chance. She's slipping, she tells him, as if her body is an alien form. Yes, she has a one way ticket to a climatic death come end season.

But the kicker to the show was Cally, Cheif, and Tori. Cliff notes: Cally commits suicide, Cheif becomes depressed, and Tori is a bad guy. But I have to get something off of my chest. Cally has always been the one character I hated. She has a fat face and a bad delievery. The producers were wise to keep her in the background, and I even began to like her innocent flirting and adrupt marriage with the Cheif. However, whenever she said anything or got angry or was shown at all as the center of a shot, I hated her. I so glad she's gone. Next, Tori has always been teh one character I strongly disliked. She always looks as if she's been drugged and she is not, I repeat not a looker. I thought I was to get a two-fer in that airlock, but no.

The question is, Tori? No doubt her motivation comes from Baltar, who she might have love at first sight with. His absence from this episode is a strong indicator that he instructed her to do so, which means he probably knows everything Tori does. He has his theories about Hera, the Cylon-human hybrid. Finding out that the Cheif was a Cylon, meant that his baby was also a hybrid, and fundamental to the future. Thus, Tori was sent to comandeer the child and knock off an annoying character.

This begins what would seem to be one big spiral for the Cheif. I loved the flashbacks, and the reminders of the happiness of the seasons past, and how young and thin he looked back then, but really, that's the happiest we'll see him till this show ends. He's in a corner, and dangerous in the same degree of Tori (who, still at Roslin's side, could be sowing much more damage than just one kill).

IN OTHER NEWS, all familiar faces not needed were exported to a sewage ship, Kara married Sam because he was pathetic, Sam got a very pathetic tattoo, I like Sam and Sam's tattoo, am I pathetic?

Like Cheif, I suspect that, given the relationships that have been destroyed (all save Helo, that mirror of constants), right about now is the time that characters are going through that unhappy stage that has to come before the happy stage in fiction. So, no more happiness until the end. I'm reminded of the point in The Muppet's Christmas Carol, where, when the action gets a little scary, narrators Gonzo and Rizzo peace out, telling the audience, "we'll see you in the lobby."